Friday, January 14, 2011

On keeping my mouth shut

Do you ever have inappropriate thoughts come into your head?

No, no I don't mean those inappropriate thoughts, well, maybe you do...but I mean the kind of thoughts that really shouldn't be said out loud?

Well, I was at the chiropractor this morning and as he was stretching my neck he asked if I was doing anything fun over the weekend. I told him a few things I might be doing, then I asked him if he had any plans.

He mentioned several things- work out, clean off the salty paw prints from his car seats {from his dog that he brings into the office}, etc. then he mentioned that he needed to go grocery shopping.

As soon as he said it a thought came into my mind of something I read on a blogger friend's blog:

"I hate pooping. Total 'waste' of time sitting in a stinky cubicle. I have to go grocery shopping. I hate spending money on food. I love to eat good food. Good food makes you poop. I hate to poop. I hate to spend money on poop."

Yup, that's what came into my mind when my chiropractor said he needed to go grocery shopping.

Good thing I didn't say it because I was thisclose. That would have been awkward. Real awkward. It probably would have made him throw up in my face.

What I did say? "Oh, grocery shopping's always fun!"

Good censorship, Natasha. Good job...

Oh, and by the way, I was referred to this chiropractor by a male friend (C.) who had gone to him before.

C. asked me at FHE on Monday how I liked this chiropractor (first day going to him) and I said I thought he was good.

He said "Oh, really? Yeah, I think you like him for other reasons, don't you?" And then he winked at me.

Geez, what type of person do I look like? Yeah, the only reason I go to a male chiropractor is so I can have a man touch me....on my neck and back. Cause goodness knows I'm not getting it anywhere else.

But he does smell good. Just saying.


Noelle said...

I'm going to take lessons from you on keeping my mouth shut.

And if that chiropracter smells good...go to him every single day! That's what I would do! :)

Becky said...

Laughed so hard! Love you!

Anonymous said...

you are pure perfection you know that?!

Nancy said...

Oh, Natasha....!

Natasha and Jesse said...

Noelle- It only works sometimes. He probably would have just laughed, but glad I didn't say if after all. And sadly, insurance only pays for so many visits otherwise I would be going everyday!

Becky- Glad to give you a laugh! Love you too!

Holly- I do what I can. ;-)

Nancy- What can I say? At least it didn't come out of my mouth.

Valerie said...

You make me laugh :)

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